Monday, June 25, 2012

Showing Up


A couple of weeks ago I wrote about Almalek.  
I've been struggling with my Almalek lately.
The gematria is  doubt/ספק

Sometimes I seriously doubt my ability to write and that what I have to say is overly dramatic or not well thought out.

Silly; stupid; not significant.
vacuous - empty - senseless - blank - foolish - vacant

I haven't written in a couple of weeks and I feel like I'm about to burst.

Today I just made myself log on at and write.
I got through it and did a little over 750 words in about 30 minutes.  

This is with my husband in the house working with a plumber and two apprentice plumbers, the drill going and shouting from the courtyard into the bathroom window to turn the water on and then turn the water off, and then the electric jackhammer thud, thud thudding away on the cement block walls. 

A pipe broke.

One of them was in the bathroom floor and the other was inside my head.

And now the words are coming out.  

I wrote, cold, without a rough draft or hours of thought, a comment on a blog post too.

And to total strangers! 

I saw the blog post on another list I belong to and it looked interesting so I jumped over there and it reminded me of something that I learned last week, so I wrote about it. 

Then my husband came home from the bank and told me that someone had deposited money in our checking just keeps flowing. 

This feels good.

Have a productive day.  Today, tomorrow, everyday.

And don't ever let your Almalek scare you out  of writing.

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